Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Back To School - And A Few Random Things

So, my kiddos finally went back to school on Monday - first grade and third grade.
Look at those beautiful girls:


Of course they wanted to goof around, and I had to BEG for just ONE good picture.  "C'mon, you two - just one good one!  Pretend you like each other!"  After much cajoling, I finally got a result.  Both Anna's feet are on the ground, she is looking at the camera, and Ella isn't frowning or showing me her underwear - SCORE.

I cannot believe I'm a Momma to such lovely, smart, BIG girls!

Things are going OK so far - only a few minor school-related meltdowns (my oldest likes to complain, and her sister is anxiety-prone... I have NO idea where they get that from.  *whistles*).  At any rate, I'm hoping this bodes well for the rest of the year.  :)

As for me?

I got rid of the blonde highlights for fall... thinking of getting some rich caramel color put in... we'll see.  :)

I'm getting my house in order finally, after a long, messy summer, and it feels good to have a little order and structure back in my life.  Though, I must admit, it's lonely here without all the little voices....  :(

I've been running a LOT of errands lately, and have a few tips:

* If you are out running errands and decide to get your eyebrows waxed, for the love of God, do it last...  unless you like people looking at you like you grew an extra head, that is.

* When you go to a nail salon for said waxing, the tech WILL notice your gnarly toenails and try to up-sell you on a pedicure.  Wear closed-toe shoes.

* If you need anything even SLIGHTLY out of the box, don't go to GNC.  They suck.  The woman didn't even know what sublingual meant... I had to spell it out for her, and then they didn't even have what I needed.

* Eat before you take your car into the dealership.  If you don't, you'll suddenly find yourself making a 3-course meal out of Gardettos, stale danish, and coffee that tastes like lighter fluid.  There are better ways to go about getting nourishment.

* When you go to Sam's Club hungry, there will never be any sample ladies hanging around.  It's a universal law.

* The one time you have to run an errand (or have an appointment) in the evening is the one night your kid will have a CRAPLOAD of homework.  Count on it.

You're welcome.  :)



Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Goodbye To Chester

Today is a sad day.

Today we said goodbye to Chester.

Chester was my sister's dog, and I have known him, and been either with him or close to him since he came to the family in 1997.


He was a cantankerous dog, and hated pretty much everyone, but he tolerated me.  He was crazy smart, crazy active, super intelligent, and LOVED frisbees.  When he was little, he was so obsessed, we had to spell it... F.R.I.S.B.E.E.  But that didn't last long AT ALL... he learned how to spell it!

I took him to meet Lauren's class in elementary school.  I squirted him with a water gun when he was a puppy, because he barked to get my attention the entire time I was trying to do my college homework.  I threw a million frisbees for him.  I petted him when almost nobody else would touch him (because he was mean).  I stood up for him, told everyone he was too smart for his own good, that's why he was cranky.  I think he was my doggie soul-mate.  :)

We buried him with a frisbee tonight.  A storm was rolling in, and two seconds after the last mound of dirt was put on his grave, the heavens opened up.  When I was little I heard that rain during a funeral was a good omen... I looked it up after it happened tonight.  Apparently folklore says that rain during a funeral means that the deceased was accepted into heaven.

Welcome to heaven, Chester, you cranky boy.
I'm glad I got to know you.  :)

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Toddler Flashback

So, for the last two days I've been presiding over a brood of FOUR rather than my usual two.

It's been an experience, for sure.  I am an old pro at handling two - you get used to the interpersonal dynamics, know how to defuse situations, and are fairly adept at keeping things clean enough to avoid a nasty visit from the Department of Health.  But with two extras?  It's a little tricky.... especially when three are around the same age, and the third is a toddler.

I am not used to having a toddler around, anymore.

It's true what they say:  you forget.  Your mind just locks it away in a vault, and all you remember are the rosy bits.  You forget how two year-old kids put everything in their mouths.  You forget how utterly Houdini-like toddlers are, and how they FIND EVERYTHING.  You forget that the minute you put the toddler down for a nap, he/she will inevitably poop - it's like a Pavlovian trigger:  nap = poop.  I'd forgotten it all, but it came crashing back with a quickness as soon as I spotted said two year-old RIDING my (15 lb) dog, clutching my child's (pricey!) portable game system, and sucking on a silver ring.  YIKES!

And yes, she did poop as soon as I put her down for a nap... the first day.  Today she pooped while she was playing, and when I walked into the room, do you know how I knew?  The dog.  The FREAKING DOG was nipping at her behind.  GROSS!

Said dog chewed a hole in the diaper to try to get to the poop.  (Note to self:  babies and Jack Russell Terriers do not mix.)  I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, though... this is the same dog that prefers dirty, bug-filled, fetid standing water to the fresh, clean, cold water in her bowl.  Blech.

At any rate, I'm kind of pooped (ha).
I'd forgotten how 'on your toes' you need to be with the under-4 set.  The child is a perfectly pleasant kid, but I must say - I'm very grateful for vasectomies today.  :)  I'm over the poop thing.

Monday, August 13, 2012

The Shot

Boy, did I give birth to a dynamite little Drama Queen.
Lest you think I'm 'mean' in that description, let me give you a few examples:

* Two nights ago she kept me up, hysterically crying (her, not me) due to an unspecified pain in one foot.

* I had to pick the kids up early from VBS one night, and DQ wailed.  And wailed, and wailed... I had to carry her out.

* The shockwave player on her computer was apparently acting up the other day.  I had no idea.  However, I did believe she was being disemboweled by a mutant wolf - her screams were that bone-chilling.  Oh, and did I mention I was in the bathroom at the time?  Yeah.

* Last week she discovered a hole in one of her beloved stuffed animals - need I say more?

This brings us nicely up to a few days ago, when DQ had a sore throat.  OMG, you would think she had smallpox, polio, and the plague all at once - clearly she was dying, and in the most painful way possible.  She had a fever, though, and her throat was red, so off to the doctor.

Strep throat.
I told her it was up to her - she could get meds, or a shot.  (I will admit to talking up the shot, however, because remembering meds twice a day for 10 days is a PAIN.)  To my surprise, she opted for the shot -until she saw it.

Cue banshee.
"I don't WANT it!"
"NO! NOOOOO!  It's big!"

So, I sweet talk her, hold her still, and bam... it's over.  SO I THINK.
Turns out, the fun's JUST beginning.

*SCREAM*
She's holding her hip, SCREAMING the walls down.  And what is she screaming?
"IT HURTS!!  I changed my mind, I CHANGED MY MIND!  TAKE IT AWAY!"

Mind you, the shot was already in her, and traveling through her little drama-rific bloodstream.  Yet more proof that my child thinks I have supernatural powers, or that I am at the very least a demigod.  She was FURIOUS with me that I wouldn't 'let' her change her mind.

I had to promise the child Chick-Fil-A AND ice cream to avoid being carted away by the cops for apparent child abuse.  Boy, oh boy.

Note to self:  Antibiotic shots = pure craziness.



Friday, August 10, 2012

Wall Hanging (And An Accuquilt!)

I've been sewing like crazy lately!
I've got a few projects going right now, and one that I just finished.  I finally made something for myself - a wall hanging:


Next up are a bug quilt, and a sea turtle quilt for my daughters.  :)  Too bad I cut out all the squares for the bug quilt last week, because yesterday my husband surprised me with THIS!  An Accuquilt!  Woo!


If you've never heard about this amazing piece of equipment, you should!  http://www.accuquilt.com/  It cuts your quilt squares with perfect precision - up to SIX layers at a time.  I can do in 20 seconds what it normally would take me 30 minutes (or more) to do.  Ah-mayzing.  This thing is super easy to use, cuts like BUTTER, and slashes your workload by an amazing amount.  (My scissor fingers are weeping tears of joy.)

I'm so stoked to make my first project using my brand-new cutter!

Friday, August 3, 2012

I Love The Smell Of Notebooks In The Morning...

What is it about buying composition books, binders, paper and pencils that makes me so happy?

It's tax-free weekend here in NC, and the perfect opportunity to do some back-to-school shopping, so the kids and I hit up Target today.  Ohhh, the notebooks and stacks of paper make me feel giddy with excitement - and I'm not even the one going back to school!

There is just something about a pristine notebook, perfectly sharpened pencils, and a brand-new box of crayons... it's almost a feeling of reverence for such clean, perfect goodness, and the promise of neat organization and a new start.  Yes, only I can turn a few notebooks and pencils into a religious experience!  LOL.  Hey, you gotta start somewhere, right?

But seriously... the smell of new notebooks and crisp paper still makes me feel nervous excitement in the pit of my stomach.  All those years of conditioning die hard, I suppose.  :)

I love this time of year.  :D
I may even have to go back to the store and snag some fresh pencils and notebooks for myself - just because I can.

4 weeks until school starts, and I think (know, actually) that I'm more nervous than the kids.  For once, I'M the one dreading the start of school, new supplies notwithstanding. I'm nervous about Anna, and how she'll do this year... I can't take another year like this last one!

Thursday, August 2, 2012

I Hate Pinworms

Just a normal day in the neighborhood.

My kids have pinworms again, I have laundry piled up to the ceiling (largely due to the pinworm debacle), and I've spent the last few days bleaching my entire house, cleaning carpets, and cleaning the caves of shit otherwise known as kid rooms.

I think I'm going to go batshit insane.  Soon.
I am seriously worn out.

On the other hand, it is so nice to have everything in order and in it's place, if only for a little while.  I love it, but it's so hard for one person to keep up in a house this size!  (Plus, I live with at least two (possibly three) people who have an episode of 'Hoarders' in their future.)

Four weeks until school starts back!  I should be happy (and I am, in a way), but I'm nervous.  Nervous about how the year will go for Anna... what teacher will she get?  Will we be able to hold off her triggers, will her teacher be cooperative, will she be able to make (and keep) friends?  Are her therapies actually helping? There's a knot in my stomach thinking about it.  She's not thrilled about going back, either... she has asked me several times to homeschool her.  I feel badly, but I'm not ready to take that leap yet.  We'll see.

I'm going back to school in the winter... yep, a little nervous.  It's been a while!  I'm worried that I won't be able to keep up my grades with the kids, Anna's therapies, their homework, the house, Girl Scouts, the pets... there will be a LOT on my plate.

Whew.  I sense a lot of Starbucks in my future.

In other news, my niece is pregnant!  I will be a Great-Aunt for the 9th time in March.  :)  I must have been thinking of her before I went to bed last night, because I dreamed I adopted an 8 year-old girl from China... when I woke up I felt sad, like I missed this fictional kid.  Crazy!  I have very vivid and emotionally-charged dreams.

Meh.  Enough with the prattling, I guess, and back to cleaning.  By the time I'm done, you'd be able to perform surgery on my bathroom floor.  :D