Thursday, March 17, 2011

The Kissing Tree

What is it with kids and one-word answers?

Me: "How was school today, Anna?"
A: "Good!"


Me: "What did you do?"
A: "I played."

Uh oh... two words! Now we're getting somewhere!
Usually I would just let it go, but for some reason that day I kept asking questions.

Me: "Who did you play with?"
A: "Waylan. He's my boyfriend!"
Me: "Waylan is your boyfriend?"
A: "Yep! And every day when we go outside me and Waylan wait until nobody is looking and go behind 'the kissing tree'. He kisses me, and then we go play!"

Uh, WHAT?! *cue Mama Bear* At this point I'm freaking out a little, wondering what in the world is going on in FIRST GRADE these days, and why this little punk is kissing my daughter! *growl*

Me (in a dangerously calm and level voice): "Waylan kisses you? WHERE does he kiss you?"
A (smiling): "Every day we go to the kissing tree and he kisses me right here (holding up her hand and pointing to the back of it) and then we go play together!"

On the back of her hand, like a little gentleman. Every day, Waylan kisses my little girl on the back of her hand, and treats her like a princess. Some day, when she's old enough for a real boyfriend, I hope she finds a nice guy who will treat her exactly the way Waylan treated her in first grade. :)

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Rawr. I'm A Dinosaur.

Do you know how old I was when I got my first computer?
I was sixteen years old... AND there were exactly two things my computer could do (or rather, only two things I could feasibly make it do) - write stuff, and play 'Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego?'

My first experience with internet access was when I was 20, living with my sister, back in the AOL 'You've got mail!' days. My first computer with real programs and *gasp* internet access came when I was 22... and even then it was only the pop-up happy, connection-challenged freebie access from Net Zero.

So, with all that being what it is, my daughter's proficiency with the computer is a little unnerving to me. I'm minding my own business today when I hear an unfamiliar song coming from the office... so I go to investigate. Turns out my daughter (yes, my SIX YEAR-OLD) was on Google watching a video about how to make a Leprechaun trap.


Seriously, I'm kind of a dinosaur. I love my iPhone, but if it weren't for my husband I would probably still be happily chatting on my 7lb flip phone (circa 1996)and using dial-up. And really?? HD, Blu-Ray, plasma screen, 4G... what?

Apparently my daughter got her Dad's genes because she's already mastered the search engine and randomly asks when she can 'get her own Facebook'. Yeah. That's gonna happen.

Time to implement some parental controls, methinks, before she figures out the whole 'hacking' thing. This could get ugly.

Monday, March 7, 2011

In the Nick of Time

Ever have a moment in your life that feels like that? Like you've made it in the nick of time, like everything has come together to make it possible....

I did. Once upon a time I had a moment like that, one that seemed too good to be true. 100% in the nick of time. The coincidence of the moment seemed too much to ignore... as if it was meant to be.

Now that I'm older and more jaded, I realize that 'in the nick of time' translates roughly to 'on the rebound', 'on the heels of a crisis', or both a and b. Lets face it, normally we don't think of ourselves as being in the nick of time if there wasn't something we were up against.

I was reading a book, and the author used the phrase 'in the nick of time', and I realized without a second thought that I knew exactly how the story would end. I was completely unsurprised.

It never translates in real life the way people think it should. Real life is far more complicated. That 'nick of time' moment may have been just that for someone, but even if it feels right you must always remember that you might not be the beneficiary... the nick of time moment might have been for the other person. YOU might have been sent to THEM in the nick of time... sometimes that's enough.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Dawn and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Yeah. It hasn't been a good one.
9:22 am, and I already want a do-over!

Last night I made the cutest Thing 1 and Thing 2 cupcakes for my daughter's class, complete with cotton candy hair. I was quite pleased with myself... I had everything ready to go, and was on top of things for once.

I should have known that signaled trouble. When animals begin acting strangely, you know a natural disaster is coming... well, same here. When I'm on top of things and seem to have it all together, it's a clue that a catastrophe will soon follow.

The morning started off as usual... but then I went to peek at the cupcakes. DISASTER! The cotton candy 'melted' (for lack of a better word) and formed a hard, gross-looking coating on my lovely cupcakes. Emergency repairs needed to be done, and they just didn't look as good after that. *sniff*

Tense. I decide to go relax on Facebook for a minute. Right before I plopped into my desk chair, something caught my eye - cat vomit. The little creep vomited all over my desk chair, and all over the floor surrounding it. I get it cleaned up, and it's about this time that I realize I've lost my phone.


Yeah, I know. Call it! No can do... it needed to be charged. I spent two hours searching and stressing out before I found it.

To top it off, as my oldest daughter was leaving, she reminded me that it is school picture day. Ask me if she's dressed nicely? Yeah. You guessed it.

Then the little one couldn't find her shoes, and her breakfast was a cheese stick in the car on the way to school. Which, by the way, she got all over her lovely outfit. Oh, and before leaving P asks me if I'm going to the gym today (yet again). By this point I'm feeling rather stabby.

Seriously? Do-over?