Friday, January 1, 2010

None Of That Baby Business

Sometimes I have to wonder just where my daughter gets all her ideas.

For instance, we had a very interesting conversation on Wednesday that went a little something like this:

A: Mommy, I'm not EVER going to have a baby.
Me: Why not?
A: Because I don't want to have surgery.
Me: Well, you probably wouldn't have to have surgery. Most women don't need surgery to have a baby.
A: Oh. Well, then, how does the baby get out?

Oh boy. Yes, one of the dreaded questions. (The other being "How did the baby get IN?") I thought about it for a second, and decided to go with frank honesty and gave her the Cliff's Notes version of the miracle of birth.

Oh, so the baby just comes down from the tummy and 'plops' out?
Me: Sort of. (IF ONLY!!)
A: And you have to catch it?
Me: No, you go to the hospital, and the doctor catches it.
A: And cleans it up?
Me: Yes, and cleans it up.

At this point she is satisfied and wanders off to play, break something, harrass her sister... whatever. A few minutes later, though, she's back:

A: I still don't think I want to have a baby, Mom.
Me: Oh yeah?
A: Yeah. I decided I'm going to marry a girl and make HER have the baby.

Smart kid.